Happy Halloween! Did you know Trick-or-Treating is an American past time? I had some friends from Europe and when I told them about Trick-or-Treating they said, "You do what?!"
Trick-or-Treating Tips: Only go to houses where you know the people. Inspect all candy before letting your child eat it. Do not let your child eat candy that is unwrapped or isn't sealed. No eating other unwrapped food items either (apples, raisins or pretzels). The safest Trick-or-Treating I hear is the mall. Kids can't dart into the street while walking inside a mall. If you do door-to-door Trick-or-Treating walk with your children at least to the house's walkway and make sure no one runs. You don't want your child tripping on their costume and falling down. Have adequate light. I.e, flashlights. There is to be no darting into the street or in driveways. Make sure your children can see through their masks and aren't too hot or too cold (bring sweater/jacket to wear over costume). Make sure your child says "Trick-or-Treat" politely and thanks the person after they take their piece of candy. And a have spooky good time! Note: If you think your child has collected too much candy see if your school donates candy to a homeless organization, woman's and children's shelter, or a veteran's home.
Saturday, October 31, 2009
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Parenting Article: Help for Interruptions and Noncompliance
Help for Interruptions and Noncompliance
Are you having trouble with a child who constantly interrupts you when you get on the telephone or computer? Does your child ignore you when you ask them to do something? Then do something about it, starting today! From my experience as a former nanny usually these issues don't just magically appear at age nine or ten. I've met a couple of parents who insist they never had a problem with it before. In most cases I tend to disagree. It slowly builds upon itself. The more you overlook the problem or pay little heed to it because that's easier to do, it will continue. When the behavior escalates to be a real nuisance that's when you start deciding it's a serious issue. Think about this: There are parents who think it's cute when their two-year-old interrupts them to give them a hug and some sweet talk when their working on the computer. But then these same parents, when their child is older, get upset when their child interrupts them to ask them questions when they're on their computer working. Your child needs to know what is expected of them early on. It will save you from getting aggravated later.
To stop the cycle of noncompliance that is already in progress, sit down with your child when you both are relaxed and explain to him or her what kind of behavior is expected of them. Let's take this situation: Your child often interrupts you while you're on the phone. Tell your child they need to respect that when you're on the phone you don't want to be disturbed. If they need to tell you something they are to wait until you're off the phone. Unless of course the house is on fire or some other emergency. I also recommend this, before you get on the phone (1) tell them you're getting on the phone and (2) ask them if they need anything first. You are giving them an opportunity to have your attention. And you could stop an interruption from occurring if you can solve a problem or a need now. (Do this even if your child knows you get on the phone everyday at 4 p.m. to make work calls.)
The case of the mysterious tummy aches. I met a mother who told me her daughter mysterious would get stomach aches when she got on the phone. They would strangely disappear when the call was over. We both agreed her daughter was seeking attention. To combat the problem the mother would tell her daughter whenever she about to go on the phone. She would then ask her daughter if she needed anything because she didn't want to be disturbed while on the phone. The mother also made her telephone calls shorter. She cut way down on long conversations of an hour or more, unless her daughter was in bed. The mother also would periodically stop talking on the phone at her discretion and check in with her daughter to see if she was doing okay. The phone related stomach aches lessened, a lot. This advice can be beneficial as well if you frequently get interrupted while on the computer while paying bills.
What if your child refuses to comply on other matters other than reoccurring interruptions? If they refuse to bus their dinner plate after dinner, turn off the T.V. when told, or other such things, bring an end to this disobedient behavior by not indulging in arguments or threats about it. Do not repeatedly threatened them to stop doing XYZ or else. Why should they if you won't ever do "or else." Tell your child what you expect of them and if they don't do it then they will have a consequence; such as, lose computer time for that day. Don't go overboard and say for a month. Do day by day. When you pick a consequence make sure that it's an actual consequence. Don't say you can't ride your bike if they don't like to ride their bike anyway. Pick something that will encourage them to correct their behavior. Once you give a consequence don't back down. Don't be drawn into an argument. Tell your child there will be no discussion about it. And the consequence is not open for negotiation. Some child can be very defiant so you must stick to it. They might rebel and have a tantrum. They are pushing to see if you really mean it. DO NOT BACK DOWN! You can tell them you are not backing down and if they are upset about it they can go to their home. In some cases you might have to escort them there.
That said, I do support positive reinforcement; especially with children with ADD and ADHD. When you see your child busing their plate or doing their homework before T.V., acknowledge it. Tell them what a great job they are doing and that you really appreciate them listening to you. Children like to be praised. And people of all ages like to be appreciated. You can offer incentives to your child for not interrupting you while you're on the computer or for when they wash the dog when you ask them. Pick incentives your child will like. However, don't go overboard. One incentive I'm not crazy about is offering monetary incentives for good behavior. As an adult you do not get money for not yelling at your brother. And I have yet to hear about a child who grew up and is repeatedly rewarded $2 every time they pick up their clothes off the bathroom floor.
Are you having trouble with a child who constantly interrupts you when you get on the telephone or computer? Does your child ignore you when you ask them to do something? Then do something about it, starting today! From my experience as a former nanny usually these issues don't just magically appear at age nine or ten. I've met a couple of parents who insist they never had a problem with it before. In most cases I tend to disagree. It slowly builds upon itself. The more you overlook the problem or pay little heed to it because that's easier to do, it will continue. When the behavior escalates to be a real nuisance that's when you start deciding it's a serious issue. Think about this: There are parents who think it's cute when their two-year-old interrupts them to give them a hug and some sweet talk when their working on the computer. But then these same parents, when their child is older, get upset when their child interrupts them to ask them questions when they're on their computer working. Your child needs to know what is expected of them early on. It will save you from getting aggravated later.
To stop the cycle of noncompliance that is already in progress, sit down with your child when you both are relaxed and explain to him or her what kind of behavior is expected of them. Let's take this situation: Your child often interrupts you while you're on the phone. Tell your child they need to respect that when you're on the phone you don't want to be disturbed. If they need to tell you something they are to wait until you're off the phone. Unless of course the house is on fire or some other emergency. I also recommend this, before you get on the phone (1) tell them you're getting on the phone and (2) ask them if they need anything first. You are giving them an opportunity to have your attention. And you could stop an interruption from occurring if you can solve a problem or a need now. (Do this even if your child knows you get on the phone everyday at 4 p.m. to make work calls.)
The case of the mysterious tummy aches. I met a mother who told me her daughter mysterious would get stomach aches when she got on the phone. They would strangely disappear when the call was over. We both agreed her daughter was seeking attention. To combat the problem the mother would tell her daughter whenever she about to go on the phone. She would then ask her daughter if she needed anything because she didn't want to be disturbed while on the phone. The mother also made her telephone calls shorter. She cut way down on long conversations of an hour or more, unless her daughter was in bed. The mother also would periodically stop talking on the phone at her discretion and check in with her daughter to see if she was doing okay. The phone related stomach aches lessened, a lot. This advice can be beneficial as well if you frequently get interrupted while on the computer while paying bills.
What if your child refuses to comply on other matters other than reoccurring interruptions? If they refuse to bus their dinner plate after dinner, turn off the T.V. when told, or other such things, bring an end to this disobedient behavior by not indulging in arguments or threats about it. Do not repeatedly threatened them to stop doing XYZ or else. Why should they if you won't ever do "or else." Tell your child what you expect of them and if they don't do it then they will have a consequence; such as, lose computer time for that day. Don't go overboard and say for a month. Do day by day. When you pick a consequence make sure that it's an actual consequence. Don't say you can't ride your bike if they don't like to ride their bike anyway. Pick something that will encourage them to correct their behavior. Once you give a consequence don't back down. Don't be drawn into an argument. Tell your child there will be no discussion about it. And the consequence is not open for negotiation. Some child can be very defiant so you must stick to it. They might rebel and have a tantrum. They are pushing to see if you really mean it. DO NOT BACK DOWN! You can tell them you are not backing down and if they are upset about it they can go to their home. In some cases you might have to escort them there.
That said, I do support positive reinforcement; especially with children with ADD and ADHD. When you see your child busing their plate or doing their homework before T.V., acknowledge it. Tell them what a great job they are doing and that you really appreciate them listening to you. Children like to be praised. And people of all ages like to be appreciated. You can offer incentives to your child for not interrupting you while you're on the computer or for when they wash the dog when you ask them. Pick incentives your child will like. However, don't go overboard. One incentive I'm not crazy about is offering monetary incentives for good behavior. As an adult you do not get money for not yelling at your brother. And I have yet to hear about a child who grew up and is repeatedly rewarded $2 every time they pick up their clothes off the bathroom floor.
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Movie Review
Just in time for Halloween. Movie Title: Hocus Pocus. Comedy with witches. Rated PG. The story starts out in the 1600's in Salem, Massachusetts. A teenage boy follows three witches, the Sanderson sisters, to their house where they have taken his sister. To keep themselves young the witches suck the life force out of children. The boy tries saving his sister. While trying to do so the witches put a spell on him, changing him into a black cat. He is to remain this way for all eternity. The Sanderson sisters are hung (As a movie viewer I actually wasn't exposed to it. I only saw their feet swaying.), but before they die they vow to come back.
Flash forward to modern times in Salem, Massachusetts. Lore now has it that on Halloween night a black cat guards the Sanderson house, warning away any person who could make the witch-sisters come back. A new teen in town, Max, doesn't believe in the tale. On Halloween night while taking his pesky younger sister, Danny, Trick-or-Treating, Max meets a girl in his class. They decide to check out the old Sanderson house. Danny has to be persuaded to go along. Once at the witches' old home, Max lights a candle, despite a black cat jumping on him to try to stop him. Lighting the candle brings the witches back to life. The kids and cat run out of the house taking the witches spell book with them. The eldest witch-sister (Bette Milder) is enraged. If the witches can't get the spell book back before dawn and cast a special spell, which includes sucking the life force out of children, the sisters will turn to dust. The three sisters chase the kids all over town in an effort to get the spell book back.
I thought the plot overall was quite good and there are some funny moments. The movie was fast paced enough to keep you interested. Bette Miller does a fine job as the bossy older witch-sister. Jessica Parker is quite funny as the ditsy youngest witch. And the young actress who plays Danny charms you. It's fun to watch her be pesky. Note: There is a zombie in the movie but he is quite harmless. And check out the brooms the sisters fly on throughout the movie.
Flash forward to modern times in Salem, Massachusetts. Lore now has it that on Halloween night a black cat guards the Sanderson house, warning away any person who could make the witch-sisters come back. A new teen in town, Max, doesn't believe in the tale. On Halloween night while taking his pesky younger sister, Danny, Trick-or-Treating, Max meets a girl in his class. They decide to check out the old Sanderson house. Danny has to be persuaded to go along. Once at the witches' old home, Max lights a candle, despite a black cat jumping on him to try to stop him. Lighting the candle brings the witches back to life. The kids and cat run out of the house taking the witches spell book with them. The eldest witch-sister (Bette Milder) is enraged. If the witches can't get the spell book back before dawn and cast a special spell, which includes sucking the life force out of children, the sisters will turn to dust. The three sisters chase the kids all over town in an effort to get the spell book back.
I thought the plot overall was quite good and there are some funny moments. The movie was fast paced enough to keep you interested. Bette Miller does a fine job as the bossy older witch-sister. Jessica Parker is quite funny as the ditsy youngest witch. And the young actress who plays Danny charms you. It's fun to watch her be pesky. Note: There is a zombie in the movie but he is quite harmless. And check out the brooms the sisters fly on throughout the movie.
Monday, October 26, 2009
Book Review- chapter book for 3rd grade
"Horrible Harry at Halloween," by Susy Kline. Pictures by Frank Remkiewicz. I can see why there is a series of Horrible Harry books. Harry is a mischievous, yet likable boy. The story is told from the view of Harry's best friend, Doug. In the beginning of "Horrible Harry at Halloween," the students in Harry's class try to guess what he will be for Halloween. But Harry wants it be a surprise. My favorite chapter is where you learn some cool science facts. I think boys, as well as girls will find the information interesting. So interesting they might want to try the experiments written about at home. And why not? It could be fun. My favorite picture is where Doug is dressed up as a centaur, half man half horse. He has the back of a horse costume behind him, with the legs and hoofs attached to a skateboard so they can slide behind him as he walks. Neat!
Saturday, October 24, 2009
Parenting Article: Help for a Kid who is being Bullied
Help for a Child who is being bullied
Too bad there's not a fast acting magical solution for your child when they encounter a bully. Like them saying, "Bully BEGONE!" and poof the bully is gone. As far as bullies go I do not support the line that defeat can only make you stronger. Let's face it going against a bully can be stressful. And it can be even more stressful knowing it can happen again. I take a hard line against bullies. Their unacceptable behavior should not be tolerated. There is no excuse for bullying another, harassing or intimidating a classmate, or tormenting a younger kid. Even if a bully's home life is difficult that does not give them the right to make life difficult for other children. So what can your child do when faced with a bully?
#1- Have them avoid situations where they could encounter bullies. They should not hang out where they hang out. Avoid them. When walking home take a different route. And walk with a friend or a group. For if there is only one bully and six other kids, the bully is out numbered if the other kids stick together.
#2- Your child should not let another child frighten them into giving them their money/having to do another kid's homework/etc. If this happens your child needs to go tell an adult/teacher. If the bully says, "It is my word against yours." Well, guess what, once an adult is told the bully now has a record that they did X. This will be helpful for any other future intimidating this child does. If the harassment continues go see the principle. Protect your child.
#3- You might not agree with me but I have seen this work: Enroll your child in a self defense class for confidence. Empower your child. Bullies like to go after kids who are weaker than them. When looking for karate or judo classes ask if they also work on self confidence. You can talk to the teacher about what your child is going through. Sometimes it can be helpful for a child to talk to an adult they admire and respect about a bullying problem. Especially if this adult went through the same problem as them as a kid.
4#- This can work in some cases if you know the bully and their parent yourself. And where your school might not take an assertive stand on bullies or where it is just happening in your neighborhood. Have a calm talk with the bully and their parent. By showing you are emotionally in control shows you are being reasonable and logical about the situation. If you yell at the bully or their parent that will give them an excuse to tune you out. You want to help your child not make things worse. Plus, there are times when parents are not aware their child is bullying other kids. This may be because the bully is getting away with it by scaring kids with their hush up method (if you tell anyone you will be in more trouble). So it is important to let a parent know if their child is bullying another. But again I repeat do not yell your complaint to the other parent. People do not like to be yelled at. I believe you will get further trying to be calm as possible when you explain the situation.
Too bad there's not a fast acting magical solution for your child when they encounter a bully. Like them saying, "Bully BEGONE!" and poof the bully is gone. As far as bullies go I do not support the line that defeat can only make you stronger. Let's face it going against a bully can be stressful. And it can be even more stressful knowing it can happen again. I take a hard line against bullies. Their unacceptable behavior should not be tolerated. There is no excuse for bullying another, harassing or intimidating a classmate, or tormenting a younger kid. Even if a bully's home life is difficult that does not give them the right to make life difficult for other children. So what can your child do when faced with a bully?
#1- Have them avoid situations where they could encounter bullies. They should not hang out where they hang out. Avoid them. When walking home take a different route. And walk with a friend or a group. For if there is only one bully and six other kids, the bully is out numbered if the other kids stick together.
#2- Your child should not let another child frighten them into giving them their money/having to do another kid's homework/etc. If this happens your child needs to go tell an adult/teacher. If the bully says, "It is my word against yours." Well, guess what, once an adult is told the bully now has a record that they did X. This will be helpful for any other future intimidating this child does. If the harassment continues go see the principle. Protect your child.
#3- You might not agree with me but I have seen this work: Enroll your child in a self defense class for confidence. Empower your child. Bullies like to go after kids who are weaker than them. When looking for karate or judo classes ask if they also work on self confidence. You can talk to the teacher about what your child is going through. Sometimes it can be helpful for a child to talk to an adult they admire and respect about a bullying problem. Especially if this adult went through the same problem as them as a kid.
4#- This can work in some cases if you know the bully and their parent yourself. And where your school might not take an assertive stand on bullies or where it is just happening in your neighborhood. Have a calm talk with the bully and their parent. By showing you are emotionally in control shows you are being reasonable and logical about the situation. If you yell at the bully or their parent that will give them an excuse to tune you out. You want to help your child not make things worse. Plus, there are times when parents are not aware their child is bullying other kids. This may be because the bully is getting away with it by scaring kids with their hush up method (if you tell anyone you will be in more trouble). So it is important to let a parent know if their child is bullying another. But again I repeat do not yell your complaint to the other parent. People do not like to be yelled at. I believe you will get further trying to be calm as possible when you explain the situation.
Friday, October 23, 2009
Movie Review
Movie title: Abbott and Costello meet Frankenstein. This is an old movie. My two nephews (9 and 11) thought it was funny. But I told them about 1940's slapstick movies before they watched it. They know it's NOT okay to slap anyone as a joke. If you are strict, which is okay, or have a child who might start doing this type of behavior if they see it, skip this movie. In a parenting article I wrote I write about the issue of slapstick in movies which I will post before Christmas.
What the movie is about: Two friends have jobs as railroad baggage claim clerks. While working one night they get a shipment of two coffins. One Dracula. The other, Frankenstein's monster. But surprise, surprise the two aren't really dead. One of the men has a girlfriend who is cahoots with Dracula. She and Dracula plan to put her boyfriend's simple brain into Frankenstein's monster. This sets the stage for going to a remote island where the operation is planned to take place. Lots of laughs. I always root for the bungling but lovable character Lou Costello plays. And I love the predictable happy endings. If you let your child watch this movie with you I think they will find the beginning funny when Costello has a difficult time with the luggage. Note: This movie does have monsters. And young children might not get the jokes. For kids ages ten and up. For adults there are some funny quips.
What the movie is about: Two friends have jobs as railroad baggage claim clerks. While working one night they get a shipment of two coffins. One Dracula. The other, Frankenstein's monster. But surprise, surprise the two aren't really dead. One of the men has a girlfriend who is cahoots with Dracula. She and Dracula plan to put her boyfriend's simple brain into Frankenstein's monster. This sets the stage for going to a remote island where the operation is planned to take place. Lots of laughs. I always root for the bungling but lovable character Lou Costello plays. And I love the predictable happy endings. If you let your child watch this movie with you I think they will find the beginning funny when Costello has a difficult time with the luggage. Note: This movie does have monsters. And young children might not get the jokes. For kids ages ten and up. For adults there are some funny quips.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Arts and Crafts Project for Halloween
This is an easy fun activity. Create Hanging Ghosts. For grade school children.
Needed items: White soft nose tissue or paper tissue. String. Scissors. Marker. Little rubber ball the size of a quarter/or something similar.
Wrap two tissues over rubber ball which is the head. Tissue should hang equally, downwards, on all sides. If you plan to make only one ghost you can keep rubber ball in. If you plan to make more, take rubber ball out and stuff head area with half a tissue. Cut six to seven inches of string. Tie string around ghost's neck so it can hang from branch. But before hanging you can, with a marker, dot eyes on the face and make an O for the mouth. I've seen kids hang lots of tissue ghosts from branches for more effect.
Needed items: White soft nose tissue or paper tissue. String. Scissors. Marker. Little rubber ball the size of a quarter/or something similar.
Wrap two tissues over rubber ball which is the head. Tissue should hang equally, downwards, on all sides. If you plan to make only one ghost you can keep rubber ball in. If you plan to make more, take rubber ball out and stuff head area with half a tissue. Cut six to seven inches of string. Tie string around ghost's neck so it can hang from branch. But before hanging you can, with a marker, dot eyes on the face and make an O for the mouth. I've seen kids hang lots of tissue ghosts from branches for more effect.
Monday, October 19, 2009
Book Review for Older Kids
Depending on how well your child reads: For fourth/fifth grade through middle school readers.
Gris Grimly's adaptation of "The Legend of Sleepy Hollow" originally written by Washington Irving. Mr. Grimly gives his version of this American classic. He does it well. He writes like a poet. Describing people, their surrounding and all matter of things in a colorful manner. Grimly has his own style of writing and drawing. The illustrations in his book are in a comic strip style which I think children, especially boys will like. I don't mean to be sexist, but it seems the way the book is laid out it was created to attract boys. Which is not a bad thing, since we want boys to read as much as girls. Some of the pictures are down right funny.
Now for the story: It's about a school teacher named Ichabod Crane who lives in the town of Sleepy Hallow. He would like to marry the beautiful daughter of a wealthy farmer. But he has a rival for her hand. Ichabod goes to a party one night where his rival is in attendance. Party goers tell stories about the Headless Horseman of Sleepy Hallow. On the way home from the party Ichabod meets up with a headless horseman.
Gris Grimly's adaptation of "The Legend of Sleepy Hollow" originally written by Washington Irving. Mr. Grimly gives his version of this American classic. He does it well. He writes like a poet. Describing people, their surrounding and all matter of things in a colorful manner. Grimly has his own style of writing and drawing. The illustrations in his book are in a comic strip style which I think children, especially boys will like. I don't mean to be sexist, but it seems the way the book is laid out it was created to attract boys. Which is not a bad thing, since we want boys to read as much as girls. Some of the pictures are down right funny.
Now for the story: It's about a school teacher named Ichabod Crane who lives in the town of Sleepy Hallow. He would like to marry the beautiful daughter of a wealthy farmer. But he has a rival for her hand. Ichabod goes to a party one night where his rival is in attendance. Party goers tell stories about the Headless Horseman of Sleepy Hallow. On the way home from the party Ichabod meets up with a headless horseman.
Saturday, October 17, 2009
Parenting Article- Talking to your Child
I believe in doing things with your child to bond with them. Especially fun activities. This gives them good memories. Additionally, when you are doing a fun activity with your child you can talk about what's going on with them at school in a non-threatening environment. You can also ask questions about what is going on in their life in general. A threatening environment might be during homework. You usually nag them about homework during this time. If you ask why they are slacking off on their homework lately during homework time I believe the answer to this question will not give you as much information as you need then if you asked it at another time in a non-threatening environment.
Let's say you want to ask this question to your child, "So how are doing making up with your friend?" It is better to ask it when your child is relaxed, not when they are busy reading, just got home from a hard day at school, or had a bad day at soccer practice. Today do something with your child or teen (if they aren't already busy.) Surprise them with a trip to the ice cream store. Walk there and talk about things. Find out what's happening in your child's life. Get the low down, it makes you more informed. If you find out they are having trouble with the other kids at school this might be the reason they have stopped doing their homework or don't care about school anymore.
Let's say you want to ask this question to your child, "So how are doing making up with your friend?" It is better to ask it when your child is relaxed, not when they are busy reading, just got home from a hard day at school, or had a bad day at soccer practice. Today do something with your child or teen (if they aren't already busy.) Surprise them with a trip to the ice cream store. Walk there and talk about things. Find out what's happening in your child's life. Get the low down, it makes you more informed. If you find out they are having trouble with the other kids at school this might be the reason they have stopped doing their homework or don't care about school anymore.
Friday, October 16, 2009
Movie Review
Movie Title: Freaky Friday. Comedy. Rated G, 1976 movie. There are two versions of this movie. Overall I like the original better with Jodie Foster as the daughter, but the newer one is hipper. I would like to say in the more modern one Jamie Lee Curtis does a great job as the mom. 1976 version: A teenage daughter (Jodie Foster) thinks her mother has the easy life. No school. Her mother thinks her unruly daughter has an easy life. No housework. One Friday night something freaky happens, they accidentally switch bodies. With hilarious results. They also learn to appreciate each other. But can they ever change back? There are some funny moments with the 1976 version. Jody Foster is so laid back about things until she switches bodies and jobs with her mom.
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Food Project for Halloween- Carmel Apples
Caramel apples. A Halloween treat. What you need: Apples (Granny Smith are I think are best for this.) Popsicle sticks. A bag of caramels. Cookie sheet. Wax paper. Double pot that has handles. Note: Be careful working with hot caramel.
Line cookie sheet with wax paper. Wash apples and dry them. Place apples on cookie sheet, spacing them at least 3-4 inches apart. Melt caramels in a double pot (A pot that fits inside a pot. The first pot on the stove boils water; the other pot inside this melts the caramels.) When caramels are melted carefully pour over apples. Before the caramel cools on the apple poke popsicle stick in top. This will be the handle so your child can eat the caramel apple. If you must have caramel on the bottom of the apples you can try this. Before you place apples on wax paper pour a little melted caramel on the spots you plan to place apples. Then quickly place apples in this caramel. Now you can pour caramel on top of apples. Let carameled apples cool and harden before eating them.
Line cookie sheet with wax paper. Wash apples and dry them. Place apples on cookie sheet, spacing them at least 3-4 inches apart. Melt caramels in a double pot (A pot that fits inside a pot. The first pot on the stove boils water; the other pot inside this melts the caramels.) When caramels are melted carefully pour over apples. Before the caramel cools on the apple poke popsicle stick in top. This will be the handle so your child can eat the caramel apple. If you must have caramel on the bottom of the apples you can try this. Before you place apples on wax paper pour a little melted caramel on the spots you plan to place apples. Then quickly place apples in this caramel. Now you can pour caramel on top of apples. Let carameled apples cool and harden before eating them.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Halloween Picture Book for New Readers
Get really for Halloween with "The Hallo-Wiener" by Dav Pilkey. It's a whimsical picture book for new readers. I really liked it. I think your kids will think it's funny. See if you can find it at your local library.
A little dog named Oscar Myer, who is shaped like a hot-dog, is given a Halloween costume to wear by his mother. It's a giant hot-dog bun with mustard. Though disappointed it's not a scary costume Oscar wears it. See the results it renders him by reading the book.
A little dog named Oscar Myer, who is shaped like a hot-dog, is given a Halloween costume to wear by his mother. It's a giant hot-dog bun with mustard. Though disappointed it's not a scary costume Oscar wears it. See the results it renders him by reading the book.
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Overcoming Power Struggles with your Child
Do you have daily power struggles with your child? This can take its toll on both of you. First, take time to reflect on when these power struggles occur. Is it over food? Homework? Bedtime? Having friends come over? Or just about everything?
If you can narrow down the problem it's helpful. If you only have power struggles over food, rethink how you approach the situation. Let's say its dinner time and your child says they aren't going to eat the meal. You argue back and forth about them eating. You finally give in and let them not eat. But you also let them drink three glasses of milk to fill themselves up. (1) Three glasses of milk is not a substitute for dinner. You can't make your child eat, but you can decide what they can eat and drink. So don't let them fill themselves up on milk. (2) If they are a picky eater finds foods they like to eat. (3) Lastly, do be grateful that eating is the only issue you have with your child. Things could be worse. Don't make power struggles. Pick your battles. It's not worth the stress on the family.
However, if you have power struggles over many issues you should take a stand, because the more your child gets away with things the more power struggles you might end up having. Be firm. And say what you want your child to do in a firm manner. If you say things in weak or baby sweet voice your child won't take you as seriously. This could be where your problem lies. You don't have to yell at your child to get them to do something, but you need to show your child you mean business by using a firm tone of voice. Let's say you have a daily problem of getting your child to get off the computer. You usually say in a sing-song voice, "Sweety time to get off the computer. You know it's time." Your child says, "Just a few more minutes mom." You say, "Okay Sweety." Stop. Think about this. Your child knows you don't mean it when you say it's time to get off the computer because you are letting them have a few more minutes. Which could lead to a few more minutes. And then that could lead into you both arguing about it. Also, your voice wasn't consistent with what you wanted. Children pick up on this. You must be firm in your voice and in your decision. Time to get off the computer means time to get off the computer. Now grant it with the computer they might need a couple of minutes to finish something. So you could say this, "Tim, I'm giving you your five minute warning. I want you to start saving what you're doing now and get off the computer." If Tim agrees and does not get off the computer in five minutes, you need to shut the computer down for him. If he has a fit, there's no computer time for tomorrow. No exceptions. I believe power struggles keep happening because parents don't take a firm enough stand with what they want AND aren't consistent with their follow through. You have to be. Change will take time, but it should happen. At first your child could get angry. Work through this. Let him know it's not okay to not do what you asked him to do.
Some children will try arguing with you once you make your decision. You say, "Time to go to bed." They say, "Do I have to? Why?" Don't get into a debate about it. Tell them what you want them to do and walk away. I know a parent who does this. Yes, her child does try to follow her and say, "But why? Give me one good reason?" You could have eight. That's not the point. You should expect your child to listen to you. Children who have opposition defiant disorder can try to push and push issues. I believe this is what you should do: Say what you expect of them and tell them you are walking away because they are arguing about it. If they talk back and say how rude you are being, don't fall for the bait. You know you aren't being rude. They know it too. They are just trying to get you to argue about it. Say what you expect them to do and don't let there be a power struggle about it. One parent who acknowledged they had trouble when speaking to their child about their expectations found this helpful. Write down on a piece of paper, "I will take a firm stand with what I expect of my child. I will also consistently follow through with what I have decided. We will not argue about it. There will be no power struggles about it." Look at this and repeat it. If you start believing it, then hopefully you will start implementing it. Subsequently, you should see a change in how you deal with your child and how they react to what you expect of them.
If you can narrow down the problem it's helpful. If you only have power struggles over food, rethink how you approach the situation. Let's say its dinner time and your child says they aren't going to eat the meal. You argue back and forth about them eating. You finally give in and let them not eat. But you also let them drink three glasses of milk to fill themselves up. (1) Three glasses of milk is not a substitute for dinner. You can't make your child eat, but you can decide what they can eat and drink. So don't let them fill themselves up on milk. (2) If they are a picky eater finds foods they like to eat. (3) Lastly, do be grateful that eating is the only issue you have with your child. Things could be worse. Don't make power struggles. Pick your battles. It's not worth the stress on the family.
However, if you have power struggles over many issues you should take a stand, because the more your child gets away with things the more power struggles you might end up having. Be firm. And say what you want your child to do in a firm manner. If you say things in weak or baby sweet voice your child won't take you as seriously. This could be where your problem lies. You don't have to yell at your child to get them to do something, but you need to show your child you mean business by using a firm tone of voice. Let's say you have a daily problem of getting your child to get off the computer. You usually say in a sing-song voice, "Sweety time to get off the computer. You know it's time." Your child says, "Just a few more minutes mom." You say, "Okay Sweety." Stop. Think about this. Your child knows you don't mean it when you say it's time to get off the computer because you are letting them have a few more minutes. Which could lead to a few more minutes. And then that could lead into you both arguing about it. Also, your voice wasn't consistent with what you wanted. Children pick up on this. You must be firm in your voice and in your decision. Time to get off the computer means time to get off the computer. Now grant it with the computer they might need a couple of minutes to finish something. So you could say this, "Tim, I'm giving you your five minute warning. I want you to start saving what you're doing now and get off the computer." If Tim agrees and does not get off the computer in five minutes, you need to shut the computer down for him. If he has a fit, there's no computer time for tomorrow. No exceptions. I believe power struggles keep happening because parents don't take a firm enough stand with what they want AND aren't consistent with their follow through. You have to be. Change will take time, but it should happen. At first your child could get angry. Work through this. Let him know it's not okay to not do what you asked him to do.
Some children will try arguing with you once you make your decision. You say, "Time to go to bed." They say, "Do I have to? Why?" Don't get into a debate about it. Tell them what you want them to do and walk away. I know a parent who does this. Yes, her child does try to follow her and say, "But why? Give me one good reason?" You could have eight. That's not the point. You should expect your child to listen to you. Children who have opposition defiant disorder can try to push and push issues. I believe this is what you should do: Say what you expect of them and tell them you are walking away because they are arguing about it. If they talk back and say how rude you are being, don't fall for the bait. You know you aren't being rude. They know it too. They are just trying to get you to argue about it. Say what you expect them to do and don't let there be a power struggle about it. One parent who acknowledged they had trouble when speaking to their child about their expectations found this helpful. Write down on a piece of paper, "I will take a firm stand with what I expect of my child. I will also consistently follow through with what I have decided. We will not argue about it. There will be no power struggles about it." Look at this and repeat it. If you start believing it, then hopefully you will start implementing it. Subsequently, you should see a change in how you deal with your child and how they react to what you expect of them.
Saturday, October 10, 2009
Movie Review
Movie Title: The Witches. Children-Magical. Rated PG. Based on a book by Roald Dahl author of "Charlie and the Chocolate factory." A little boy named Luke stays at a seaside hotel with his grandmother. Something odd happens. Can a little boy really turn into a mouse? Luke uncovers an evil plot. Witches posing as regular folks have come to the hotel for a witch's convention. The grand high witch (wonderfully played by Anjelica Huston) wants to turn all the children into mice. Luke must stop the grand high witch before it's too late. This is a great movie to get really for Halloween.
Thursday, October 8, 2009
Arts and Crafts Project: Mask
What you need: Popsicle stick, paper plate or stiff construction paper, yarn, glue, scissors, crayons or markers.
Either use a paper plate or using the construction paper, make a circle as big as your child's head. Cut circle out. This is the mask. Cut eyes holes out of the mask. You can also cut out a nose hole and mouth hole. For the mouth hole you can show emotion by cutting the hole into a smile, a frown, an angry look, etc. Or you can just draw the mouth on. For a scary Halloween look, draw big pointy teeth on the mouth with a scar nearby. Draw mean bushy eyebrows or make eyebrows out of yarn. For the nose you can make a long beak out of construction paper. Glue green and orange yarn on top of the mask for hair.
If your child wants to look a cat, draw whiskers around the nose and make pointy ears out of construction paper and glue them on top of the mask. Draw pretty long eyelashes around the eyeholes. Use your imagination. When you're done, glue the popsicle stick to the bottom of the mask, making it a handle to hold up the mask in front of the face.
Alternative: For children over five-years-old. Instead of your child holding mask up with a popsicle stick you can also keep mask in place with an elastic band. But YOU MUST MAKE A BIG NOSE HOLE AND MOUTH HOLE IN MASK so your child is sure to be able to breathe. Just having eyeholes won't allow your child to breathe. If you decide to use elastic you might want to use a paper plate that's not incredibly stiff. You can staple the elastic on the sides. Have your child try on the mask to make sure the elastic isn't too tight around their head. (NEVER use shoe lace, string or anything that can be tied too tight around their head! Your child must be able to take off mask quickly and easily. You don't want the mask to get stuck, covering their nose, as they're taking it off.) You can put masking tape over the staples. This could lessen the chance of faces scratches and also from the staples getting caught in your child's hair. If you are concerned about using staples you can make tiny holes on the sides of mask to tie the elastic band in place. Note: It can get hot under a mask. Don't wear mask in extreme heat or near a fire/sparks. Keep mask out of reach when not in use.
Either use a paper plate or using the construction paper, make a circle as big as your child's head. Cut circle out. This is the mask. Cut eyes holes out of the mask. You can also cut out a nose hole and mouth hole. For the mouth hole you can show emotion by cutting the hole into a smile, a frown, an angry look, etc. Or you can just draw the mouth on. For a scary Halloween look, draw big pointy teeth on the mouth with a scar nearby. Draw mean bushy eyebrows or make eyebrows out of yarn. For the nose you can make a long beak out of construction paper. Glue green and orange yarn on top of the mask for hair.
If your child wants to look a cat, draw whiskers around the nose and make pointy ears out of construction paper and glue them on top of the mask. Draw pretty long eyelashes around the eyeholes. Use your imagination. When you're done, glue the popsicle stick to the bottom of the mask, making it a handle to hold up the mask in front of the face.
Alternative: For children over five-years-old. Instead of your child holding mask up with a popsicle stick you can also keep mask in place with an elastic band. But YOU MUST MAKE A BIG NOSE HOLE AND MOUTH HOLE IN MASK so your child is sure to be able to breathe. Just having eyeholes won't allow your child to breathe. If you decide to use elastic you might want to use a paper plate that's not incredibly stiff. You can staple the elastic on the sides. Have your child try on the mask to make sure the elastic isn't too tight around their head. (NEVER use shoe lace, string or anything that can be tied too tight around their head! Your child must be able to take off mask quickly and easily. You don't want the mask to get stuck, covering their nose, as they're taking it off.) You can put masking tape over the staples. This could lessen the chance of faces scratches and also from the staples getting caught in your child's hair. If you are concerned about using staples you can make tiny holes on the sides of mask to tie the elastic band in place. Note: It can get hot under a mask. Don't wear mask in extreme heat or near a fire/sparks. Keep mask out of reach when not in use.
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Halloween Book for Kids
"The Little Old Lady Who Was Not Afraid of Anything" by Linda Williams. Pictures by Megan Lloyd. It's a cute book for Halloween. A little old lady takes a walk through a forest. Along the way she sees shoes that clomp, pants that wiggle, a shirt that shakes- with no one in them! I liked the clever ending to this book.
Sunday, October 4, 2009
Parenting Article: Lessons for Parents about Your Child Wanting to Fit In
Not Fitting In is No Fun.
People liked to be liked. That includes children. There's nothing wrong with your child wanting to fit in with their peers. But it does become a problem when they're spending more than a normal amount of time being concerned with it. What is a normal amount of time? It's depends on each case. As a parent you need to be the judge. Is your child's personality changing for the worse? Are they so concerned about fitting in that they're putting down kids at school? As far as the way their classmates dress, you should teach your child that other kids should be allowed to express their self in their own way as long as it's in appropriate taste.
It's normal for children to exert their own independence as far as clothes. I wouldn't make a fuss if your nine-year-old wants to wear two different colored socks to school or his T-shirt backwards or inside out. If his school is okay with it why argue about? It might be all the rage at his school. Remember to pick your battles. Would you rather a child who wore two different socks to school but who was also well mannered? Or a child who wore matching socks but screamed bloody murder if you poured too much milk in his cereal?
However, if your son wants to wear his shirt backwards at his uncle's wedding that's where you can draw the line. His appearance should not negatively reflect on another. Your child should learn to think of others. This said, as a parent you should be respectful of what your child dislikes. As long as it's not everything. Or near to it. But if they absolutely hate to wear the color yellow, don't make them wear yellow shirts. Even if you think they'll look cute. You can ask them why they don't like yellow shirts. Maybe your son will say wearing yellow embarrasses him. If so, drop it. Even if wearing yellow doesn't embarrass you. Your son is an individual, not you. If your child doesn't want to wear the cap with the tiny hearts Grandma made him/her, don't force them to wear it. Sure they can show it off for Grandma when she's at your house. But don't make them wear it out of the house if they find it embarrassing. It's hard to fit in if you feel embarrassed. This is how you create belligerency in children. Also, don't force your child to dress like you if they don't like it. I once overheard an eight-year-old girl say to her friends something like, "I can't stand it when my mom wants to do the twin thing." Meaning, wearing the same exact dress as her mother but in a smaller size. If they don't want to do it, don't push it. And don't make them feel bad. Don't force your style on your child, even if you have great fashion sense. A child learns her or his own identity through exploring. This exploring includes fashion taste. I've noticed with children that it's the school years that are critical about fitting in. Once they are in the real world with more options they don't feel the need to fit in as much.
Now if your child wants your advice on what shirt would go with what pants, give it. But let them keep their own style. You might think a certain belt would go great with the pants as well. You can tell them, but if they nix the idea, let it go. Your child is an individual not a mini-you. Now, growing up I wish I had a mother with more fashion sense. Because I didn't have much, if any. I had a friend in the same boat. Thankfully, I went to a school where I had to wear a uniform. My friend wasn't as lucky. She wished she had an aunt or an older sister who could have guided her through the fashion world in middle school. It's hard getting knocked down verbally due to what you wear, or can't afford. If your child asks for fashion help, and you can't properly give it, ask a friend or a relative to step in.
The boy who wanted to fit in. There was a little boy who wanted the other boys at school to accept him more. But he dressed, "differently." He didn't fit in. He liked to button up his shirts to the collar. And he liked wearing his pants over the waist line because it felt right. But it made his pants look like there was a flood due any moment. His mother kindly pointed out to him maybe he could try undoing his top button and wearing his pants a little lower so his socks wouldn't show. He was truly mystified that this could be the reason why the other boys thought he was a little different. He said something to the effect of, "But why is there a button on the top of my shirt if I'm not supposed to button it to the top?" He ignored his mother's advice on how to dress to fit in better. It took a kindly "cool" older relative, who this boy admired, to show him the ropes on dressing to fit in. Mind you this boy wanted help. And the help was given in way he didn't feel he was doing something stupid by the way he had been dressing. He was happy with the advice and felt more confident socially once he started being excepted by the other boys.
Last remarks: Typically a child who thinks they fit in socially has more confidence than a child who doesn't believe this. It is my belief children who feel they aren't liked or don't fit in can get depressed. They can get angry and vent their feeling by picking on other kids or causing trouble in their family. Some kids like to cause trouble because at least then they'll get noticed.
People liked to be liked. That includes children. There's nothing wrong with your child wanting to fit in with their peers. But it does become a problem when they're spending more than a normal amount of time being concerned with it. What is a normal amount of time? It's depends on each case. As a parent you need to be the judge. Is your child's personality changing for the worse? Are they so concerned about fitting in that they're putting down kids at school? As far as the way their classmates dress, you should teach your child that other kids should be allowed to express their self in their own way as long as it's in appropriate taste.
It's normal for children to exert their own independence as far as clothes. I wouldn't make a fuss if your nine-year-old wants to wear two different colored socks to school or his T-shirt backwards or inside out. If his school is okay with it why argue about? It might be all the rage at his school. Remember to pick your battles. Would you rather a child who wore two different socks to school but who was also well mannered? Or a child who wore matching socks but screamed bloody murder if you poured too much milk in his cereal?
However, if your son wants to wear his shirt backwards at his uncle's wedding that's where you can draw the line. His appearance should not negatively reflect on another. Your child should learn to think of others. This said, as a parent you should be respectful of what your child dislikes. As long as it's not everything. Or near to it. But if they absolutely hate to wear the color yellow, don't make them wear yellow shirts. Even if you think they'll look cute. You can ask them why they don't like yellow shirts. Maybe your son will say wearing yellow embarrasses him. If so, drop it. Even if wearing yellow doesn't embarrass you. Your son is an individual, not you. If your child doesn't want to wear the cap with the tiny hearts Grandma made him/her, don't force them to wear it. Sure they can show it off for Grandma when she's at your house. But don't make them wear it out of the house if they find it embarrassing. It's hard to fit in if you feel embarrassed. This is how you create belligerency in children. Also, don't force your child to dress like you if they don't like it. I once overheard an eight-year-old girl say to her friends something like, "I can't stand it when my mom wants to do the twin thing." Meaning, wearing the same exact dress as her mother but in a smaller size. If they don't want to do it, don't push it. And don't make them feel bad. Don't force your style on your child, even if you have great fashion sense. A child learns her or his own identity through exploring. This exploring includes fashion taste. I've noticed with children that it's the school years that are critical about fitting in. Once they are in the real world with more options they don't feel the need to fit in as much.
Now if your child wants your advice on what shirt would go with what pants, give it. But let them keep their own style. You might think a certain belt would go great with the pants as well. You can tell them, but if they nix the idea, let it go. Your child is an individual not a mini-you. Now, growing up I wish I had a mother with more fashion sense. Because I didn't have much, if any. I had a friend in the same boat. Thankfully, I went to a school where I had to wear a uniform. My friend wasn't as lucky. She wished she had an aunt or an older sister who could have guided her through the fashion world in middle school. It's hard getting knocked down verbally due to what you wear, or can't afford. If your child asks for fashion help, and you can't properly give it, ask a friend or a relative to step in.
The boy who wanted to fit in. There was a little boy who wanted the other boys at school to accept him more. But he dressed, "differently." He didn't fit in. He liked to button up his shirts to the collar. And he liked wearing his pants over the waist line because it felt right. But it made his pants look like there was a flood due any moment. His mother kindly pointed out to him maybe he could try undoing his top button and wearing his pants a little lower so his socks wouldn't show. He was truly mystified that this could be the reason why the other boys thought he was a little different. He said something to the effect of, "But why is there a button on the top of my shirt if I'm not supposed to button it to the top?" He ignored his mother's advice on how to dress to fit in better. It took a kindly "cool" older relative, who this boy admired, to show him the ropes on dressing to fit in. Mind you this boy wanted help. And the help was given in way he didn't feel he was doing something stupid by the way he had been dressing. He was happy with the advice and felt more confident socially once he started being excepted by the other boys.
Last remarks: Typically a child who thinks they fit in socially has more confidence than a child who doesn't believe this. It is my belief children who feel they aren't liked or don't fit in can get depressed. They can get angry and vent their feeling by picking on other kids or causing trouble in their family. Some kids like to cause trouble because at least then they'll get noticed.
Saturday, October 3, 2009
Movie Pick
Movie Title: The Prince and the Pauper. Family. Many adaptations. G or PG depending on what you get. From a book written by Mark Twain. A poor young English boy looks like the Prince. The two switch places to find out how life is like for the other. They get more than they bargained for.
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